


The Mother Of Learning

by Intern15_NightVale



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anxious Katsuki Yuuri, Ends with Confident Katsuki Yuuri, Gen, Grand Prix Final, I'm Sorry, I've had this in the works for a while, It ends on a good note I swear, Katsuki Yuuri doesn't deserve this, One Shot, Pre-Slash, Supernatural Elements, Time Loop, Victor Nikiforov is Shook, Yuri Plisetsky Has a Crush on Katsuki Yuuri, Yuri Plisetsky Is a Katsuki Yuuri Fan, Yuuri Katsuki Just Broke The Skating World, figure skating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-31
Updated: 2018-08-31
Packaged: 2019-07-05 01:56:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15853869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intern15_NightVale/pseuds/Intern15_NightVale
Summary: Instead of finding himself under the guidance of Victor Nikiforov; Katsuki Yuuri makes a wish right before the incident following the finale of the Grand Prix. Everyone knows the saying, "you have to be careful what you wish for", or where Yuuri learned it the hard way.





	The Mother Of Learning

**Author's Note:**

> This is a one-shot I have been meaning to write for a while. I do not own Yuuri on Ice or any of the characters. Also the pre-slash can be for whichever pairing you prefer. Hope you enjoy! Comment or Kudos!

Katsuki Yuuri was born a healthy baby boy, average in everything. Nothing stood out about the small black haired baby except the small birthmark on his right shoulder. If one didn't know any better they would have mistook it for a tattoo. It was so dark it was almost black and in the shape of a crescent moon. When his mother saw it she thought it was an omen of good luck. She often called Yuuri her little “Moon Lily,” and cooed at his round face. 

Katsuki Yuuri was the youngest son of Hiroko and Toshiya, owners of a hot springs inn. They watched as their little boy grew and shone brightly. He followed his older sister around like a small ducking, even crying to go with her to her ballet class. It was how he started going as well; Minako had taken to the young boy who tried to imitate his older sister. Soon it became his favorite thing to do and being doted on by Minako-sensei helped. He continued to dance even when his sister stopped; and his talent showed. Almost with a grace of a flower blowing gently in the wind, Yuuri started to win local contests. Minako smiled as her prodigy became more refined and effortlessly took to dancing. Yet she knew Yuuri’s heart belonged to the ice since he was introduced to it. She would often watch as he flew above the ice and skated to music shared between him and the frozen water beneath him. While Yuuri did well in Ballet competitions he utterly collapsed under the pressure in skating. He did well while he was in Japan but as he advanced further his nerves seemed to get the better of him.

That’s why she suggested that he go to America and perhaps living on his own would allow him to gain confidence and independence. He found friends but sadly Minako saw that he still struggled with the audiences and expectations. 

Katsuki Yuuri was losing hope.

Yuuri typed away on his phone as he looked at the reports that popped up immediately after his terrible performance. A part of him couldn't believe he did so badly in front of his idol Viktor Nikiforov, someone who was brighter than the sun. They speculated about his horrible performance and their comments hurt. They were comments he told himself on the ice, they were comments that he told himself every time he started to skate or dance. Small comments that cut his soul and passion, he was truly his own worst enemy.  
“Yuuri….we will do better in the next competition. It does you no good to look at your phone.” 

Yuuri got up and basically sprinted to the bathroom where he called his mother. “Hello mom.”  
“Hello Yuuri, you did great!”

Her words hurt more than they helped, “thanks mom. I have to go"  
As soon as he hung up his choked sobs escaped, his heart hurt. He didn't want to give up skating but every time he tried he failed. He loved the feel of skating but every time he would get low scores, he had failed all those people who supported him and believed him.   
The loud noise startled him and he looked up to see Yuri Plisetsky. The young boy had a furious look on his face and it scared Yuuri. “You're a piece of shit you know that! Fuck faces like you are a disgrace to this sport!”  
He was embarrassed and hurt at these words and it was what he deserved after his performance. Yuri Plisetsky was a rising star in Russia, someone who was truly talented with the ice.   
“You obviously don't have what it takes to be a skater. How did you even get into this competition? I bet you have fans that couldn't recognize talent….”  
Yuuri couldn't stand this anymore; Yuri would not talk like this about his parents who supported him at their own expense. He pushed Yuri out of the way not seeing Yuri’s startled face. And Yuuri Katsuki ran away from everything and everyone.

‘I wish I wouldn't be such a failure’ Yuuri thought before the blaring honk of a horn muffled the screams.

Yuuri Katsuki died that day at 6:45:32pm. 

 

Yuuri’s eyes opened in horror as he tasted the blood in his mouth. He looked around to see he was back in his hotel room, unlocking his phone he saw it was the day before the competition. ‘Could it have been a dream?’

Katsuki Yuuri felt uneasy but went to the bathroom to brush his teeth. He was shocked to see it blood red, and then opened his mouth to see no abrasions. He was feeling nauseous and the knock on the bathroom door must have been Celestino. “Yuuri are you alright in there?” 

Yuuri for the first time in his life was scared in his life. He had the feeling that his death hadn't been a dream. 

“Yes. I'm fine.”

Yuuri Katsuki walked out of the bathroom shaking and utterly terrified and unsure of what to do.  
“We have the party to go to. You really should come along Yuuri, before you get all stressed about the competition tomorrow. Yuuri?”

“I would like to be alone Celestino-san. I'm not feeling well.” Celestino seemed to be hesitant to leave one of his most nervous students alone. “You know you can confide in me Yuuri?” Yuuri didn't look at him and only nodded, Celestino left to the party. 

The next day Yuuri died the same way at the same time, 6:45:32pm.

Yuuri woke up crying and struggling to breathe. He ran to the bathroom and threw up what little he had in his stomach. 

This was not possible....no one could possibly come back from death. 

Celestino worried about him and his performance which seemed worse than it usually was. Yuuri found himself dying differently; this time, he had tried to avoid it.

He had lost count now. No matter how he tried to get away from his untimely death, it seemed like he could never escaped it. He remembered managing to make a flight and causing hundreds of others to perish along with him; he carried the guilt for many days. 

There was the time he had choked; he was bitten by a poisonous spider, shocked by an exposed electricity line, and several incidents involving traumatic accidents. 

He had once confided in Celestino who thought he was crazy and the stress of the competition had gotten to him. He was admitted to a mental institution to only die from cardiac arrest shortly after. 

 

Yuuri had never felt so alone. He was nowhere near Japan and calling his family never helped the situation.

 

 

Yuuri cried for a whole day once. 

He never knew one could die of sadness.

 

 

That was the turning point. 

Yuuri decided that if he was going to be stuck in a time loop that ended in his untimely death. He would take the chance to give the world one last and final show they would never forget.   
Sometimes he broke things and passed away in the hospital. Other times he would break himself so bad that it caused instant death.

Yuuri finally stopped counting the amount of times he died. 

 

Repetition, the mother of learning, had taught Yuuri many things.

It had taught him how to land his triple axles without falling. How do position his skates in midair to land just right when doing a triple lutz. His new and complex step sequence which didn’t follow the songs Celestino had chosen for him.

He learned to fly and sing along with the ice beneath him.

Yuuri learned that the crowds were nothing but noise in the background.

Never once did they affect him…never once stopping that quick death that was to follow shortly after his performance. 

Yuuri learned that after an eternity of doing movements over and over again, and pouring his soul into it before his soul was torn back into time again...there was nothing that could make him waiver anymore.

Yuuri skated like it was the last time he would ever skate, because no matter how many times he came back to life. There was always a chance that the darkness would never break into the brightness of that morning. 

 

Katsuki Yuuri was finally ready to give his last performance. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today was different. Celestino felt the relaxed nature of the room as he woke up. “I'll be doing out today Celestino. I'll be back in time for the competition.”  
“Yuuri…”

But the young Japanese boy was already gone before he could speak another word. And Celestino could only hope that he would see Yuuri at the Grand Prix.

Chris had asked about Yuuri and so had some of the others who knew of him, Celestino could only tell them that he had gone off to train so as not to worry the others. Celestino dissipated his worries through alcohol and wondered if he should call Yuuri’s parents before the competition.

 

The Grand Prix was now staring and Celestino watched as Victor Nikiforov completed his short program almost flawlessly. He wondered where Yuuri was as his student was up next and Celestino hadn't seen him in the morning or before passing out. He thanked Chris' weird hangover solution, though he would never ask the man under any circumstances what was in it. 

He was thrown out of his thought as Yuuri entered in a slightly different outfit. Celestino wondered where in the world he managed to change it before the Grand Prix started.   
“Yuuri...I heard that you changed your music selection? You should have cleared this with me first.”

It was unlike Yuuri to be completely unfazed by Celestino’s question without being extremely apologetic. He didn't even respond to Celestino's question, instead readied himself to go out on the ice.  
“Yuuri!”

The raising of his voice caught the attention of a few people around him.   
“Next up is Yuuri Katsuki, whose musical selection for the short program is Danse Macabre.”

Celestino grabbed Yuuri’s hand before he could go out, “Yuuri, what are you doing!?”  
Yuuri just ignored the man; the look on his face seemed determined and focused. Celestino had to let go as they called for Yuuri to go out onto the ice. 

Many still had their eyes on Victor; few changed their interest as the music glided through the building. It was an unusual choice for a short program; if this musical piece was done wrong it could feel unfinished or hurried.  
The music that would raise the dead bounced through the rink, making the spectators feel colder and a chill run down their spine. 

Yuri Plisetsky would rather watch the next contestant than see Victor gloat about his score to the press. He was surprised with the selection of music, but it was a nice break from the bright uplifting songs that the skaters usually chose.   
He saw as the other skater sharing a similar named was called out into the rink after being talked to by what Yuri presumed to be his coach. He saw as the pale man with black haired gracefully glided to the middle of the rink without much effort. And then the music began and the man’s body moved along with it. No...as it progressed it seemed that the music was controlling his body.   
The erratic step sequence took on a life of its own and turned into impossible jumps. 

“Amazing!” One of the commenters almost screamed the other wasn't much better off.

Yuri felt himself grow closer to the rink trying to see more of Yuuri Katsuki as he flew upon the ice like the notes of the absent instruments.   
The commenters were talking that the performance almost eerily seemed like if Yuuri Katsuki was being controlled by an unknown force...never stopping or hesitating when gliding into a triple axel or a toe loop.  
Every sway and jerk seemed to reinforce the idea that Yuuri was being influenced by strings of a violin rumored to raise the dead. 

Yuri felt movement beside him and knew that Victor Nikiforov was next to him, watching entranced next to him the little performance time that was left. 

No one else was better off; everyone was entrance by the movements that were being performed on the rink; easily shifting from soft and gentle to faster and powerful. The music and his movements seemed to build up to a dramatic end. The strings spun by the lyrical notes of a deadly violin were cut and Yuuri Katsuki was motionless right as the music had ceased. 

 

There was a roar from the stands and the competitors themselves.

 

The performance had been flawless and beautiful, keeping everyone at the edge of their seats to watch the man who had become the physical representation of the music.

Yuuri himself was breathing easily as if the complex program was something he would do in his spare time. 

He made it seem easily as going for a walk, almost as if he had done it a hundred times before.

Which he had…

Celestino couldn't believe his eyes as Yuuri never flinched or fell as he performed some moves that he had never got down in practice. “Christ Celestino….what have you been teaching the boy. That was incredible, almost seemed a bit inhumane.”

“For once in my life Yakov, I have no idea what just happened.”

 

Yuuri saw as the judges decided his score and Celestino anxiously tried to reassure him. Celestino tried in vain to get Yuuri to talk, but gave in when Yuuri requested to go back to the hotel since he claimed he was tired.

He had beat Victor's score by five points.

There was a wave of people trying to find about the Japanese skater who beat the Viktor Nikiforov.

Yuuri was gone before anyone could reach him, even friends who wanted to talk to him. He only answered a call from his mother, enjoying the familiarity of her voice for as long as he could.   
Yuuri fell asleep without a care that he was going viral due to the results today or Celestino's question of going to the party.

 

 

The next day came and Yuuri was in his room practicing ballet. It was one of the routines that Minako-sensei had performed in her years of traveling around the world. She had told Yuuri that one day he would have his own memorable day. A day where he would perform in whichever profession he chose to do and all would feel right in the world. The only thing that mattered is the music and his movements, and the feeling of complete peace from pouring one's soul into their performance. 

He entered the building and ignored the eyes that followed him as he walked through. He had heard many people calling this a showdown between him and Victor there would have been one time where Yuuri would have fainted at the idea.  
It had taken him several times to get over the fact that he stood on the podium next to Victor. Never once had he beaten his idol...the man that made him fall in love with figure skating.

 

That time had come and gone.

His death followed even if he got second or third place. Yuuri would find out if death would also follow if he won the gold. 

 

Everyone held their breath as the commenter called out Yuuri Katsuki; and announced that his musical selection was in stark contrast between what was chosen before. ‘When I Am Laid in Earth’ was a much softer song than his previous selection and would be interesting to see how he interpreted it. 

Everyone watched as Yuuri Katsuki took his place in the middle of the ice and positioned himself for the music to begin.

If the first program, showed that Yuuri Katsuki could make preform a program where his movements seemed to be controlled by the eerie instruments of the dead. Then Yuuri Katsuki’s freestyle program expressed that the music bent to his will as glided on top of the ice, his movements and jumps seemed to show his grief and pain. The music was there to put words and sound to his movements.   
At times he would reach out in his performance and it made one want to take his hands, with the loneliness that seeped from his body and onto the ice. 

Victor found himself crying at a performance that seemed to grieve the loss of something that no one could comprehend. 

Many found themselves shedding tears and wordless, too scared that a sudden noise would make the ice deity in front of them vanish into thin air.

No one expected that the one of the finale moves would be a backflip and Yuuri Katsuki to be the only man in the world to ever land it. He had wobbled slightly but many who had seen it seemed in disbelief. It was against the rules and he would not get any points for such a move, but it proved something to everyone watching.

The being on the ice that seemed to reach up for the sky as he finished, had incredible talent and stamina. He was inhuman.

And no one would forget such a passionate and memorable performance.

 

 

Victor Nikiforov found his record broken and standing beside Yuuri Katsuki who had won the Grand Prix.  
He saw as Yuuri Katsuki took his medal without any true excitement and found himself perplexed.

No one expected what came next.

 

“Yuuri Katsuki can you give a comment on your record breaking score and win today?”  
“Yuuri, can you tell how it feels from going to being Japan's best skater to winning the Grand Prix?”

Several people asked different questions, others lingering around watched to see how Yuuri would react and curious at what his response would be.

Yuuri raised his hand and everyone became quiet. “I would like to thank everyone who helped me get here but I only have one announcement.”

People paused wondering what he would say next, “I am retiring. This is my last competition. I want to thank anyone who supported me. Thank you.”

Sudden shouts of disbelief and questions followed and Yuuri looked towards his coach who wasn't hiding his shock very well.

“Yuuri we should talk about this.”

“I've made my decision already. Thank you for your services, but I am no longer in need of them.” Yuuri bowed to his coach and left the world in shock.

His call from his mother came.

“Yuuri! You did so well Moon-Lily!”  
Yuuri cried where he was standing at, on the other side of the line everyone cheered unaware of his recent actions. “I'll see you when you get home! We can celebrate by eating Katsudon!”

“Of course. I look forward to it.”

 

Yuuri did not expect for Yuri Plisetsky to confront him, “what do you mean your retiring?”

“I am retiring; I think that it's pretty clear cut on what that means.”  
The boy in front of him growled, “I'm not stupid. You were good out there. I'm sure you could continue beating Nikiforov….”

“And I already have. I won the Grand Prix’s gold medal and that is enough for me.”

There was a soft seductive voice that interrupted Yuri from speaking again. “What he means is why quit when you are just beginning. You are incredibly talented...to retire now would be a tragedy."

Yuuri whispered too low for either of them to hear, “I'm already a tragedy.”

“I'm retiring and no one will change my mind. If you'll excuse me, I need to go pack.”

 

Yuri Plisetsky and Victor Nikiforov watched as Yuuri Katsuki walked away looked at each other. 

“I'm going to get him to make my program instead, since you conveniently keep forgetting. Don't follow me, old man.”

Victor chuckled as Yuri stormed off, probably packing in order to follow Katsuki to Japan. It did not escape Victor's eyes that Yuri had been touched and deeply impressed by the man's performance. 

They were both interested in Yuuri Katsuki, and there was no doubt in his mind that they would both end up following Yuuri to his hometown. 

 

 

 

 

Elsewhere Yuuri Katsuki found himself breaking down as time passed and he was never struck where he stood.

He could finally go home.

He could finally see the people he realized after so long, were there for him through thick and thin. 

He could finally see his family.

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by what I remember from Nodame Cantabile, where someone who gives a stunning performance can go through the faze of doubting whether they can do it again. Probably my first and last fic for the YOI fandom lol.


End file.
